The summer months are upon us and it is a time of great Nisayon in many many areas. Vacation time should be a time of Aliya, no work, yet it is a time of Nisayon, of test.
I would like to mention two areas that are important. Number one, Shaylos that have to do with Yichud. This time of year people are in bungalow colonies living in close proximity one to the other. Errors in Hilchos Yichud take place. If someone in an attached bungalow is going shopping, it would be normal to say to the neighbor keep an eye on my children, my children may be sleeping, maybe they are going to sleep, maybe they are playing, please keep an eye on them.
Keep in mind that there is an Issur for a man to be Miyacheid with a girl over the age of 3 years old. So if there is a 4 year old girl sleeping in the bungalow and someone asks you to just step in and be there, and if the girl will cry you would pick up the girl, that is an Issur Yichud.
An Issur Yichud is an Issur onto itself, it is not because something may happen. Even if nothing will happen the Issur Yichud is an Issur. In the case of a girl who is a bit older it is an Issur D’oraisa, by somebody who has reached the age of Niddah. For a younger girl it is still an Issur P’nuya, which is still an Issur Yichud.
The reverse is also true. For a boy over 9 years old is an Issur Yichud for a woman and that Issur is an Issur D’oraisa. For a woman to be Miyacheid with a 9 year old. During the year, a married woman has the Heter of Bai’la B’ir. In the bungalow colonies there is no Heter of Bai’la B’ir because the husband is not in town. Certainly a single girl should not go babysitting for a 9 year old boy, even for 2 boys, because in the case of 2 boys even though 2 men and one woman is not an Issur Yichud, however, B’layla (by night) at the time people go to sleep an extra Shomer is required. These are things that I am bringing to your attention. Issurei Yichud which are more Nogea in a bungalow colony setting.
One more point. Unfortunately not everyone goes dressed properly at this time of the year. Be careful, it is Assur to recite a Beracha or Dvar Torah facing a Tefach B’isha Erva, facing a woman who is not properly covered. This is even if the woman is a Tinuk Shenishba and it is no fault. I am not condemning any person. I am talking about what we the Bnei Torah have to know. That making a Beracha facing (even if you are not looking) either a married woman whose hair is uncovered. Many women were snoods that leave the hair in the front uncovered. The most Kuladicka Shitta allows 2 fingerwidths to be uncovered. Actually, this Shitta is a bit less than 2 fingerwidths, more than that is considered to be uncovered. Making a Beracha facing that even if it is a relative, be it a wife or daughter, is Assur. So be careful.
Similarly when you are on the street, if you want to make a Shehakol on something, be careful if you are facing an Ervah even if you are not looking there is a problem making a Beracha, you can look to the side and make the Beracha that way.
If you are travelling in the trains it is certainly a problem this time of year. Rav Moshe writes in a Teshuva that Bishas Hadchak a person can rely on the Shittos Harishonim that doesn’t require looking to the side and that allows looking down or looking away. That is certainly a Heter. You are better off looking in a Sefer on the train instead of anywhere else.
I heard an incredible story about Rabbi Avigdor Miller which I had never heard before. Somebody wanted to speak to him and Rabbi Miller told him that he didn’t have any time. So the person said that I know that you go on a walk everyday so let me accompany you on the walk and I will discuss my issue with you then. Rabbi Miller replied fine, however, when I go for my walk I pick up rubber bands. The mailmen here in NY have their mail in bundles with rubber bands and they drop the rubber bands on the sidewalk. I don’t want them to be wasted. So I pick up the rubber bands as I walk. You will have to help me. The young man said fine. So they went for their walk and as they were walking they picked up 4 or 5 rubber bands. When they got to Rabbi Miller’s home at the end of the walk this man thanked him and offered him the rubber bands. Rabbi Miller said I don’t need rubber bands. The young man said I thought that you collect these rubber bands?
Rabbi Miller said I don’t need rubber bands, however, it is July and you asked me to go for a walk. Am I going to take a young man for a walk down Coney Island Avenue? You know what is going on in the street? So I told you to look at the floor for rubber bands and this way I was sure that you eyes were trained on the floor and not all over the place. What an interesting story. What a Mussar Haskeil.
I would like to mention two areas that are important. Number one, Shaylos that have to do with Yichud. This time of year people are in bungalow colonies living in close proximity one to the other. Errors in Hilchos Yichud take place. If someone in an attached bungalow is going shopping, it would be normal to say to the neighbor keep an eye on my children, my children may be sleeping, maybe they are going to sleep, maybe they are playing, please keep an eye on them.
Keep in mind that there is an Issur for a man to be Miyacheid with a girl over the age of 3 years old. So if there is a 4 year old girl sleeping in the bungalow and someone asks you to just step in and be there, and if the girl will cry you would pick up the girl, that is an Issur Yichud.
An Issur Yichud is an Issur onto itself, it is not because something may happen. Even if nothing will happen the Issur Yichud is an Issur. In the case of a girl who is a bit older it is an Issur D’oraisa, by somebody who has reached the age of Niddah. For a younger girl it is still an Issur P’nuya, which is still an Issur Yichud.
The reverse is also true. For a boy over 9 years old is an Issur Yichud for a woman and that Issur is an Issur D’oraisa. For a woman to be Miyacheid with a 9 year old. During the year, a married woman has the Heter of Bai’la B’ir. In the bungalow colonies there is no Heter of Bai’la B’ir because the husband is not in town. Certainly a single girl should not go babysitting for a 9 year old boy, even for 2 boys, because in the case of 2 boys even though 2 men and one woman is not an Issur Yichud, however, B’layla (by night) at the time people go to sleep an extra Shomer is required. These are things that I am bringing to your attention. Issurei Yichud which are more Nogea in a bungalow colony setting.
One more point. Unfortunately not everyone goes dressed properly at this time of the year. Be careful, it is Assur to recite a Beracha or Dvar Torah facing a Tefach B’isha Erva, facing a woman who is not properly covered. This is even if the woman is a Tinuk Shenishba and it is no fault. I am not condemning any person. I am talking about what we the Bnei Torah have to know. That making a Beracha facing (even if you are not looking) either a married woman whose hair is uncovered. Many women were snoods that leave the hair in the front uncovered. The most Kuladicka Shitta allows 2 fingerwidths to be uncovered. Actually, this Shitta is a bit less than 2 fingerwidths, more than that is considered to be uncovered. Making a Beracha facing that even if it is a relative, be it a wife or daughter, is Assur. So be careful.
Similarly when you are on the street, if you want to make a Shehakol on something, be careful if you are facing an Ervah even if you are not looking there is a problem making a Beracha, you can look to the side and make the Beracha that way.
If you are travelling in the trains it is certainly a problem this time of year. Rav Moshe writes in a Teshuva that Bishas Hadchak a person can rely on the Shittos Harishonim that doesn’t require looking to the side and that allows looking down or looking away. That is certainly a Heter. You are better off looking in a Sefer on the train instead of anywhere else.
I heard an incredible story about Rabbi Avigdor Miller which I had never heard before. Somebody wanted to speak to him and Rabbi Miller told him that he didn’t have any time. So the person said that I know that you go on a walk everyday so let me accompany you on the walk and I will discuss my issue with you then. Rabbi Miller replied fine, however, when I go for my walk I pick up rubber bands. The mailmen here in NY have their mail in bundles with rubber bands and they drop the rubber bands on the sidewalk. I don’t want them to be wasted. So I pick up the rubber bands as I walk. You will have to help me. The young man said fine. So they went for their walk and as they were walking they picked up 4 or 5 rubber bands. When they got to Rabbi Miller’s home at the end of the walk this man thanked him and offered him the rubber bands. Rabbi Miller said I don’t need rubber bands. The young man said I thought that you collect these rubber bands?
Rabbi Miller said I don’t need rubber bands, however, it is July and you asked me to go for a walk. Am I going to take a young man for a walk down Coney Island Avenue? You know what is going on in the street? So I told you to look at the floor for rubber bands and this way I was sure that you eyes were trained on the floor and not all over the place. What an interesting story. What a Mussar Haskeil.
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